i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
oh my god I have a fantastic druncle story to tell you. It involves a burrito, a meltdown and a bear
The burrito and meltdown are standard, but I'm intrigued by the bear
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
Randomize
