did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
Randomize
