I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
I wasn't going to drink tonight, but was reminded this is the anniversary of prohibition being repealed. If I don't, then I am against my profession of bartending and anti-American, right?
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
Randomize
