In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
Made a vodka juice box out of a ziploc bag and a straw for when I drive. Doesn't count as an open beverage container anymore.
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
Randomize
