oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
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