ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
I have post one night stand depression
Randomize
