So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
I told you when I started the only reason I was gonna coach your kids soccer team was that I could meet all the hot soccer moms. So why are you so mad I slept with your ex?
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
