I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
Randomize