final count. 18 beers. 4 shots baileys. 2 shots vodka. 1 glass champagne. vomited in the yard after losing my phone in a field for 8 hours. Possibly played tag with myself
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
Randomize
