Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
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