do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
Hi, this is a test of the morning after apology broadcast system. If you're receiving this pre-recorded message there is a high probability I was a dickwad to you in the past 24 hours. You have my utmost and sincere apologies. Also if you have my wallet, house key, left converse, or lighter, give them/it back
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
Reminder to self: never have sex on a trampoline. Trampoline burn hurts worse than carpet burn.
Randomize
