Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
Randomize
