oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
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