its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
It's never too late to be topless.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize
