I cockslap morals
I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
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