He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
