You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
We have so much sex to catch up on
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
Randomize
