I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
I learned 3 things lastnight....1. Turkeys are related to the t-rex. 2. Whales have leg bones cause they used to walk. 3. I will sing drunk in the waffle house, but not during karaoke in the bar
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
Got pulled over today for going 90 in a 40 zone with my leg out of the window. Still got out of the ticket. I'm getting way too good at this. Wanna trade bodies so we can see if it's my boobs or my charm?
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
