Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
Randomize
