I got into an eating contest with Christina. I ate 6 oranges.
Why? Who won?
we don't know. we ran out of oranges.
i'm chasing tequila w mint flavored ice cream, phil's chasing it w cream cheese, bashar's chasing it w pickles...i think we all know who the winner is....
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
Randomize
