Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
so, my congressman just called me to say he has office hours this week if i'm still interested in talking to him. i pray to god this is not related to Friday.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
Randomize
