i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
she said your name and I thought she was asking me to motorboat her. Best. Miscommunication.Ever.
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
Randomize
