ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
Why are your pants in the freezer?
Randomize
