Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
there is nothing more satisfying than playing sudoku while pooping
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
Randomize
