He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
I'm always down for nudity.
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