so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
Randomize
