I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
What drink are we having for lunch?
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
Randomize
