just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
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