We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Randomize
