Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
As girls, Bert & Ernie are not very bangable costumes. At least not by who we'd want to get banged by.
I was kidding. But I promise you I'd still find us the most eligible bangables, even if we dressed up like a dumpster and a prom night baby.
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
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