How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
i'm bringing homemade birthday cake and homegrown weed. how awesome is this text?
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
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