moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
I just found puke in my bra..
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
Randomize
