There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
Just found out I reached my $2500 deductible and I have a $5 million dollar cap on my health insurance. Let's get drunk and do something recklessly stupid tonight.
Just flooded the bathroom while masturbating in the shower. Managed to squeege most of it up. Desperately need to get laid.
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
