So, I'm about to rent a movie, order pizza, and use my vibrator.... Am I dating myself?
that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
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