Skipping work because i'm still too drunk from last night still. got home at midnight and passed out in front of my door for 2 hours bc i couldn't find my key
had to call my rooommate to let us in. Passed out in my dress and found the key on my hair tie-in my hair- just now.
Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
