I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
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