everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
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