it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
I just got caught impersonating a t-Rex by my boss. Sadly he wasn't fazed by my behavior and acted like it was normal.
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
Randomize
