Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
Randomize
