fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
