we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
He sent me a picture of his ass and said the backdoor is open. Almost grabbed my keys and a condom before I saw it was a group text. Not nearly drunk enough for his desperation.
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize
