all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
Randomize
