Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
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