you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
dude. I can hear the air.
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
