My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
Look. If you get me out of this speeding ticket you can bang my sister. Or my mom. But not both.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
My night has consisted of googling cat penises and creating a Tinder profile.
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
Randomize
