so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
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