How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
apparently i'm not the first person wake up and realize she's ugly cuz i tore this house apart and there is no sign of my clothes
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
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