I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
Every minute you wait for the sex that's not gonna happen, we're missing a tone deaf, drunk, tard-asaurus rex half-sing a 90's song to a bunch of other dinotards at karaoke.
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
Randomize
