We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
So much Jack, so little girl.
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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