Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
see... this is why i put birth control in all my friends drinks
wait.... you do what?
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
Randomize
